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Outlaws by Dnevnik
Izobčenci ukinjenega dnevnikovega foruma
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Zho
Pridružen/-a: 07.11. 2006, 21:39
Prispevkov: 824
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 Objavljeno: 20 Nov 2008 19:39 Naslov sporočila: Blondinka, veterinar in OBMP |
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Nekaj ,sicer z nekoliko patine, za sprostitev po sila naporni debati o UOSŽBMP (o Boh, kako komplicirano):
Eva, a blonde city girl, marries a rancher.
One morning, on his way out to check on the cows the rancher says to Eva, "The artificial insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today. I drove a nail into the two-by-four just above the cow's stall in the barn. You show him where the cow is when he gets here, okay?"
So the rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door.
Eva takes him down to the barn. They walk along a long row of cows and when she sees the nail, she tells him, "This is the one..... right here."
Terribly impressed by what he seemed to think just might be another ditzy blonde, the man asks, "How did you know this is the cow to be bred?"
"That's simple. By the nail over its stall," Eva explains.
Then the man asks, "What's the nail for?"
"I guess it's to hang your pants on," she tells him as she walks away.
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Čukica
Pridružen/-a: 04.11. 2006, 19:20
Prispevkov: 2810
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| Objavljeno: 20 Nov 2008 23:15 Naslov sporočila: |
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Tuhtam in tuhtam, pa mi ne svane, kaj pomenijo te famozne kratice UOSŽ? |
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Sine
Pridružen/-a: 04.11. 2006, 15:41
Prispevkov: 2471
Kraj: Kamnik
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| Objavljeno: 21 Nov 2008 07:41 Naslov sporočila: |
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Tuhtam in tuhtam, pa mi ne svane, kaj pomenijo te famozne kratice UOSŽ? |
Upravni
Odbor
Slovenskih
Železnic
TI KAR PRAŠEJ ŠE KEJ D.O.O.
_________________
ČE STISNEMO PEST, NE MOREMO POBOŽATI! |
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Zho
Pridružen/-a: 07.11. 2006, 21:39
Prispevkov: 824
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| Objavljeno: 21 Nov 2008 09:38 Naslov sporočila: |
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| Čukica je napisal/a: |
Tuhtam in tuhtam, pa mi ne svane, kaj pomenijo te famozne kratice UOSŽ? |
Sem ti že hotel pojasniti, pa me je Sine prehitel.
Sicer pa kratica v sebi skriva nekaj več;
npr.: Umetniška Oprašitev Slovenskih Živalic z ...,
ali pa: Utrujajoče Obveznostiosvoboditev Slovenskih Žena ...,
itd itd itd
Da pa ne gulimo isto kost veš čas, posredujem še Georgejev Thanksgiving sporočilo, ki se nanaša na usodo purana in ptic nasploh v človekovi režiji.
hierjuar:
A young man named John received a parrot as an early Christmas gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up the bird's vocabulary.
Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and shoved him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed .
Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said 'I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior'.
John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued.... ........
'May I enquire as to what the turkey did?'
 
A woman went to her priest with a problem. "Father, I have two female parrots, and the only know how to say one thing. All they ever say is, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Wanna have some fun?"
"That's terrible!" exclaimed the priest. "But I think I can help. Bring your two female parrots over to my house, and I will put them with my two male parrots whom I taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to praise and worship."
The next day, the woman brought her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots were holding rosary beads and quietly praying in their cage. The woman put her two female parrots in the cage with the male parrots. The females said, "Hi, we're prostitutes. Wanna have some fun?"
One male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed
"Put those beads away, our prayers have been answered!"
Happy Thanksgiving!
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Čukica
Pridružen/-a: 04.11. 2006, 19:20
Prispevkov: 2810
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| Objavljeno: 21 Nov 2008 18:53 Naslov sporočila: |
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| Sine je napisal/a: |
| Čukica je napisal/a: |
Tuhtam in tuhtam, pa mi ne svane, kaj pomenijo te famozne kratice UOSŽ? |
Upravni
Odbor
Slovenskih
Železnic
TI KAR PRAŠEJ ŠE KEJ D.O.O. |
Proti večeru sem običajno najbolj pametna, tako da ta moment vse vem, ko bo sila, se oglasim |
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| Nazaj na vrh |
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Čukica
Pridružen/-a: 04.11. 2006, 19:20
Prispevkov: 2810
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| Objavljeno: 21 Nov 2008 19:00 Naslov sporočila: |
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| Zho je napisal/a: |
| Čukica je napisal/a: |
Tuhtam in tuhtam, pa mi ne svane, kaj pomenijo te famozne kratice UOSŽ? |
Sem ti že hotel pojasniti, pa me je Sine prehitel.
Sicer pa kratica v sebi skriva nekaj več;
npr.: Umetniška Oprašitev Slovenskih Živalic z ...,
ali pa: Utrujajoče Obveznostiosvoboditev Slovenskih Žena ...,
itd itd itd
Da pa ne gulimo isto kost veš čas, posredujem še Georgejev Thanksgiving sporočilo, ki se nanaša na usodo purana in ptic nasploh v človekovi režiji.
hierjuar:
A young man named John received a parrot as an early Christmas gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up the bird's vocabulary.
Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and shoved him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed .
Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said 'I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior'.
John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued.... ........
'May I enquire as to what the turkey did?'
A woman went to her priest with a problem. "Father, I have two female parrots, and the only know how to say one thing. All they ever say is, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Wanna have some fun?"
"That's terrible!" exclaimed the priest. "But I think I can help. Bring your two female parrots over to my house, and I will put them with my two male parrots whom I taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to praise and worship."
The next day, the woman brought her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots were holding rosary beads and quietly praying in their cage. The woman put her two female parrots in the cage with the male parrots. The females said, "Hi, we're prostitutes. Wanna have some fun?"
One male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed
"Put those beads away, our prayers have been answered!"
Happy Thanksgiving!
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Pohvale prvi papigi. George? |
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